It’s episode 300, something neither of the hosts recognized while recording, so prepare to be disappointed if you’re expecting fanfare. What do we have? Well, there’s a guy melting dudes in his basement. You know shit is real when the episode begins with a “Viewer discretion is advised” screen. What else happens? Oh yeah, convicted
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JJ and Prentiss get high in “Message in a Bottle”, one of the dumbest hours this show has ever delivered us. Not since “Eyes Wide Shut” has marijuana been portrayed so poorly. But at least there’s other plot, such as Tyler running afoul of an ex-girlfriend and David Rossi cleaning a gun.
Jazz is sick (again), explaining the delay in the DTP spigot. Fear not, though, the boys are back and ready to talk about “Conspiracy vs. Theory”, the halfway point of Season 17 of Criminal Minds. Psycho Pete returns, Voit joins some sort of Suicide Squad, Politico cares about Paget Brewster beating up Paul F. Tompkins,
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Eyes are still being taken out in “Kingdom of the Blind”, episode 4 of the interminable slog that is Criminal Minds: Evolution: Season 2. This time the enucleator draws little tattoos on herself after committing the act, like Mr. Zsasz. Unlike Mr. Zsasz, nobody even approaching Alan Grant or Norm Breyfogle’s talent level is working
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Remember when Voit whispered something to Alvez and it pissed him off something fierce? Well, we find out what it is and it involves porn. Of the BAU. Rossi steamrolling Elle Greenaway while Reid wanks off in the corner. Presumably. There’s also a guy who kills people on moving day. As someone who’s moved multiple
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