A slightly intoxicated Sammi and Beau are joined by returning guest Karolinn and first-time guest Brian to discuss the 2015 Straight outta Salt Lake City series Austentatious, which asks “what would happen if the Dashwood sisters, Emma Woodhouse, and Elizabeth Bennet were all single career gals who lived on a series of sound stages? There is little here to recommend the series, from creepy, miscast, and poorly adapted characters to cheap sets and some rampant misogyny. If you were considering watching this, our advice would be “don’t.”

Warning to listeners, this might be our most profanity-riddled episode yet.

The Good: 

The purple couch was nice. The conceit behind the premise is a lot of fun, at least.

The Bad: 

All of it. Darcy is a sexist asshole, Marianne Dashwood is five-alarm angry all the time and is prepared to let her sister be homeless because she hates those leopard-print pillows THAT MUCH. Emma and Knightley the only tolerable characters (just barely), Elizabeth Bennet is…completely unrecognizable in terms of her personality, her values, and her goals. The less said about Edward Ferrars, IRS, the better.

The Ugly: 

Horrible mischaracterization, rampant misogyny, more Collins grossness that once again makes light of making a woman feel unsafe.

Verdict: 

The last time we review anything made in Utah. 

Death Comes To Pemberley was directed by Daniel Percival and stars Anna Maxwell Martin, Matthew Rhys, Matthew Goode and Jenna Coleman.

The Good: 

Unlike a lot of movies we’ve watched for this podcast, the sets, costumes and production values were all first-rate. (Though Elizabeth’s gowns lived on the frumpy side). James Norton, Matthew Goode and Jenna Coleman were really invested in their parts and gave them their all, and we liked seeing glimpses of the childhood friendship between Darcy and Wickham. The Bennets and Lady Catherine being troublesome in-laws was a particularly nice touch but we would have liked to have seen more of them or at least gotten a glimpse of Bingley.

The Bad: 

Who are these characters? This unsure woman bears little resemblance to our witty heroine Elizabeth. This shouting man couldn’t be Mr. Darcy. WHO IS THIS GUY because that is NOT Colonel Fitzwilliam. We need more than Georgiana Darcy saying that Elizabeth has brought laughter to Pemberley, we need to see some laughter. The character misfires lost our attention and the many, many convoluted B-plots couldn’t make us care.

The Ugly: 

Do you mean to seriously tell us that ELIZABETH DARCY would get up on the gallows waving around a signed confession? That really was the low point for us, and thankfully it was nearly the end.

Verdict: 

Watch if you want something to make you angry and bored at the same time.

The Good: 

First-time director Byrum Geisler does an excellent job outlining the division of class between the wealthy educated southern gents and their blue-collar counterparts. The setting felt incredibly real, and the sets were all chosen with care. Nothing looked too generic or staged. The Appalachian backdrop was stunningly beautiful and the actors, while perhaps untried, all turned in decent performances. It was very clear that everyone involved in this project was personally invested and wanted it to work very much. I especially enjoyed Chase Conner’s turn as broody working man Lee Darcy (I look forward to seeing more of him in the future) and the interpretation of Kitty and Lydia as a couple of happy, successful gay men who are the light of this movie.

The Not-to-our-tastes: 

We hesitate to use “bad” here because, as we said at the top of the show, we realize that this movie wasn’t made for us. That being said…there was very little humor in this movie. I understand that the journey of self-discovery that Lee is on is a serious story line (that in real life rural Virginia could have serious consequences) but there was very little of the sparkling wit and verbal repartee that is such an important part of Pride and Prejudice. We also would have liked to have seen more affection between men in this movie, even if it was just a hug, the brief squeeze of a shoulder or the touch of a hand. There is a lot more time dedicated to Jane and Bingley’s heterosexual attraction than the brief, fleeting kiss we get between the two male leads at the end (which quickly pans away to a tree trunk, because we hadn’t seen enough of those yet?) Even some affectionate interaction between Ben and George while they were dating would have been a nice touch. Basically, the movie didn’t quite go far enough.

The Ugly

The Cathy character was quite nasty. We’re not saying she wasn’t a necessary part of the story, but that doesn’t mean we have to like her.

Verdict: 

We are glad that it was made, even if we wanted it to be more than it was. We hope this will be the vanguard for future gay re-imaginings of Austen’s work.

Lost in Austen was directed by Dan Zeff and stars Jemima Rooper, Elliot Cowan, Hugh Bonneville and Alex Kingston

The Good: 

This miniseries is just funny as hell. Jemima Rooper really shows off her comedy chops in this with the help of the effervescent Tom Riley as the most adorable and unexpected Wickham of all time. If you don’t believe me here’s the proof. Aside from the obvious standouts of Rooper and Riley, the cast is excellent. Tom Mison takes an inspired, lovelorn turn as Bingley and Hugh Bonneville and Alex Kingston are perfectly cast as Mr. and Mrs. Bennet. Christina Cole, though perhaps typecast, is such the ideal “frosty knickers” Caroline Bingley that I’m amazed she’s never played this role before. And let’s not forget Lindsay Duncan as a refined Lady Catherine that still manages to bumble through the last part of the series.

The Bad: 

Look, we’re not in love with the Georgiana/Wickham subplot in this version. Making a young, impressionable character lie about sexual assault out of jealousy is just…not okay.

The Ugly: 

Mister Finger-Sniffing-Through-The-Pants-Zeal-of-the-Lord Collins

Metropolitan is written and directed by Whit Stillman and stars Carolyn Farina, Edward Clements, Chris Eigeman, and Taylor Nichols

The Good:

This movie gave us a lot to chew on and, as we discuss in the show, is more intellectually stimulating than our usual fare for the podcast. The concept, structure, and dialogue all earned high marks from us, but it might be Stillman’s celebration of Austen’s wit and morals (with a dash of romance) that put this movie over the top from merely ‘good’ to ‘great’ for us. And it was great seeing Chris Eigeman playing what is essentially a younger version of Digger Stiles. It makes us wonder if Amy Sherman-Palladino wrote his Gilmore Girls character specifically for him.

The Bad: 

There wasn’t much bad here, some bandying about with the word “slut” was a tad cringe-inducing, and dates the movie more than any of the costumes or sets ever could.

The Ugly: 

Rick Von Sloneker, both in character and in person.

Verdict: 

A refreshingly intelligent movie and probably the purest nod to Austen we’ve seen. It made us both rethink Mansfield Park, so that’s saying something.

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies was directed by Burr Steers and stars Lily James, Sam Riley, Bella Heathcote, Lena Headey, Charles Dance, Douglas Booth and Matt Smith

The Good: 

We won’t beat around the bush, this wasn’t a movie that we were terribly eager to watch. That being said, there were a few things we enjoyed: the Bennet Sisters’s basement training, Matt Smith, every time Lena Headey’s Lady Catherine became ruffled. The opening montage was well done and Charles Dance makes a great Mr. Bennet (or would, if he was given ANY screentime). The zombie effects were well done and we liked the opening scene for how bananas it was.

The Bad:

We were very confused as to why some regency rules still applied after a zombie apocalypse and some didn’t. Why does Lizzy seem to be the only one allowed to wear dark dresses? Why are there still balls and assemblies? Why is Darcy’s coat so loud, isn’t he supposed to be able to sneak up on the undead? Why do they need to say zombie apocalypse, won’t ‘apocalypse’ be enough on it’s own? Why is Elizabeth the stern, Mary-like sister? Not that any of these issues were dealbreakers, and ordinarily something as insane and over-the-top as a regency zombie story would be enough to guarantee our liking it, but the odd pacing and wooden acting weren’t enough to lock us in.

The Ugly: 

There was nothing truly offensive in this movie, it didn’t even come close to reaching the depths of despair that ‘A Latter-Day Comedy’ and ‘Material Girls’ plunged us into. It just…was. Though we will say were were not fond of Darcy’s great plan to feed the human brains to the good zombies of St. Lazarus, essentially committing mass murder.

Verdict: 

Eh. Watch it on a sick day.

Austenland stars Kerri Russell, JJ Field, Bret McKenzie, Jane Seymour and Jennifer Coolidge. Directed by Jerusha Hess

The Good:

Keri Russell had marvelous chemistry and rapport with everyone, but with Field in particular. The immediate friendship between her and Jennifer Coolidge’s character was a delight to watch, and her empowering realization halfway through the movie made us stand up and cheer. Bret McKenzie was charming as all-get-out and James Callis, Georgia King, and Ricky Whittle took turns making us laugh. A lot. Eagle-eyed viewers could make a drinking game out of spotting the “set animals” and “Modest” statuary in the movie.

The Bad:

A lot of the dialogue was clunky and not all of it worked. I still suspect that Jennifer Coolidge wasn’t given a script, only told to “just be yourself.”

The Ugly:

Keri Russell’s clothes until about halfway through the movie. Wowsers.

Verdict:

Smart, charming, funny. A definite rewatch.

Podcast Music by Nicolai Heidlas

Podcast art by Josh Hollis

Recommendations: Have Mercy by Shelley Ann Clark, The Bluestocking and the Rake by Norma Darcy, An Unexpected Song by Rika, The Luxury Gap by Sharla and Echoes of Pemberley by Cynthia Ingram Hensley

Song Credit: “Oh, Mr. Darcy” by The Doubleclicks

They also discuss Austen’s lasting legacy and untraditional variations of Pride & Prejudice.

Recommendations for this episode: A Searing Acquaintance by J.L. Ashton, and the many works of Abigail Reynolds, Lady Bridget’s Diary by Maya Rodale, At the Edge of the Sea by Karen M. Cox