They also discuss Austen’s lasting legacy and untraditional variations of Pride & Prejudice.

Recommendations for this episode: A Searing Acquaintance by J.L. Ashton, and the many works of Abigail Reynolds, Lady Bridget’s Diary by Maya Rodale, At the Edge of the Sea by Karen M. Cox

Recommendations for the episode: The Madness of Mr. Darcy by Alexa Adams, A Noteworthy Courtship by Laura Sanchez

Linda and Beau discuss the latest release from Joana Starnes, The Unthinkable Triangle. They discuss the changing face of the Austenesque genre, emerging authors, and recommendations for your next Mr. Darcy fix.

WE WELCOME SUBMISSIONS!!! Email rhymeswithnerdy@gmail.com if you have a book you would like to see reviewed. Our only guidelines is that the book either does not take itself seriously, or it takes itself way too seriously. Middle of the road is no fun for anyone. With that, I proudly submit our first offering, ‘The Marquess of Cake’.

Jessica:

Everything about this free Friday Barnes and Noble pick is horrifying. That photo makes me think he’s farting.

And “oh, this girl smells like sugar, i’ll totally use her to make an heir.. shit, i’m in love” is not the least bit appealing

Beth:

Going by this synopsis, he sounds like he should be diabetic…This should be a subcategory if it isn’t already.

Jessica:

I’m glancing at reviews, and apparently diabetes IS a subject in the book

Beth:

btw HATBROOK is a fantastic name. And by fantastic I mean unbelievable

Jessica:

He’s all “i can get an heir off her, cool.  Oh, her father was just knighted? SCORE”

Beth:

I won’t lie. I LOVE THAT TITLE

Jessica:

I hate the title Marquess. It’s misleading to me

Beth:

If I was going to be titled, I’d damn sure be the something of Cake.

Jessica:

It has 13 reviews on bn.com, 7 of them 5 stars. One of those starts out, “based on the cover, i thought this book was a comedy” but then they somehow proceeded to say how it was confusing at times but they loved the characters. And to them, that added up to 5 stars.

Beth:

Well and there was Cake…which seems to be a blatant attempt for the author to bribe the reader

Jessica:

Totally

Beth:

“read my book! there’s CAKE!”

Jessica:

And it’s not even clear that it’s a period piece AT ALL, but apparently it is? The last thing in the overview… “85,000 Words”…I’m not sure what to say to that… congrats? Why is that there?

Beth:

Wow I think I [my book] has more words that than that and it’s not even finished. Of course I have to spend a lot of time talking about the moment you pop a grape. Yeah, I don’t know either.

Jessica

Is it meant to sound like a lot, or is it a “hey, just read it okay? It’s short” How many people really know how many words translate out into page numbers, you know?

Beth:

I don’t know scrivener tells me. I think that’s roughly 300 pages

Jessica:

So it’s a good length. I don’t know why it’s synopsis worthy though

Beth:

Maybe they needed words to fill the synopsis

Jessica:

I don’t know, less might have been better. A simple sentence or two that said it was an unlikely love story between a baker and nobility would have been much more appealing.

Beth:

A case of mistaken identity

Jessica:

Exactly

Beth:

Sure it’s all very 12th night, pretty standard Romance Stuff

Jessica:

Instead, no matter how is actually written inside, the synopsis says “look at this asshole! Whoo, I get to be a princess!”

Beth:

Also says I LIKE CAKE AND GIRLS WHO SMELL LIKE CAKE!!! MAKE ME A CAKE BABY!!!

Jessica:

Insert picture of actual babies made of cake. The most horrifying thing they put on cakewrecks

Beth:

What is more horrifying…the baby cakes or the Birthing cakes?

I’m going to say the latter.

Jessica:

They’re both awful and in the same vein, and either fits this scenario. I mean it…You put the worst one you can find in there.

Done.

1. Why couldn’t the artist draw Amy?

SG: I thought all the guys were really well done.  Sometimes Rory wasn’t great, but the doctor usually was. Amy was almost never even recognizable
B: I agree with you in that the story was kind of goofy, but the characters all sounded like themselves
It makes me think back to that weird Dr Who/Sherlock fanvid, you know the one with the creepy dead eyes?
SG: No, I don’t know much about fanvids except the few you’ve made me watch recently
B: You would think that that would be a mashup that would work really well but it just…didn’t. And when you sit there and think about “What would mix really well with the Dr. Whoverse?” ST: TNG is not what immediately comes to mind.
SG: It worked though!  I think it could have been better, i think their scope was too big for the length they used
B: I agree, it worked pretty well. It wasn’t amazing, but I thought it was entertaining
SG: I did giggle a few times
B: I especially loved the “flashback”
SG: I laughed when Data pulled Riker out of the water, because I could just imagine him doing that, all stiff and straight-armed
B: Everything about it. The art was very clean and retro, Kirk was obviously still a total hobag…maybe the 4th Doctor laid it on a little thick with the “Jelly Babies?”
SG: In fact, I think he did…Oh man, the fight scene was absolutely insane
B: You mean the fight scene where Kirk karate chops a Cyberman?
SG: Yes!
B: LOVE
SG: I mean, it was spot on, but so crazy
B: Seriously lost it
SG: There’s one part where the Doctor is just sort of levitating on his back, and was probably supposed to be knocked backwards, but there’s no one there to knock him back
B: I think I missed that! Or forgot it, either are likely. Surprisingly a lot of Guinan
SG: And they show the Cybermen being strong enough to just crush Kirk’s phaser with a single hand, and yet here he is, whacking away
B: haha That’s Kirk for ya though
SG: I know, so full of himself. “Don’t worry, I’ve got this!”  as he goes flying through the air for a side kick which, somehow, sends the Cyberman flying…it’s so true to TOS
B: Can I say I honestly never though the Cybermen would be the ones that got the upper hand
SG: No, they never seemed very creative to me. In their thinking I mean
B: And I don’t know…they always come across as sort of bumbling. they get these ornate plans that always go badly
SG: The Borg plays out across several series of Star Trek, and a few movies, and is a serious threat. And the Cybermen were always like, “Well, the Doctor single-handedly shut down an entire operation again”
B: Exactly! The Borg always come across as totally efficient. I did like that the Conduit Borg guy tried to assimilate the Tardis…Nice try!
SG: Yeah, that was pretty sweet. And then Data became the Tardis!  I would have loved to hear more about that. And I liked when the Cybermen catch Data and say, “oh.. I guess you’re good”
B: “This one needs no upgrades!” Good old Data. I loved how delighted the Doctor was by Data
SG: Yes! He would be too, Data is the best
B:  Refresh my memory…was Wesley Crusher absent?
SG: Yes, he’s at Starfleet Academy when this takes place.  In fact, based on the star dates, the very next episode after this took place was when the Enterprise had to go to the academy because one of Wesley’s classmates was killed during a flight exercise
B: oh, I’m so glad you’re keeping track of the Timeline
SG: Just a couple of episodes later is “I, Hugh”, which is when they capture the teenage Borg and try to desimilate him; and they had this big plan to upload a virus into him and send him back to destroy the Borg, but they all have this crisis of conscience and decide not to do it. So at the end of this, the Borg is thinking about time travel
B: I was going to mention that. I knew it wasn’t the greatest idea ever, restoring the collective
SG: And then later, during the movie First Contact, they actually used time travel to try to prevent humans from making first contact with the vulcans
B: I remember that, I love that movie.
SG: They tried to prevent Zefran Cochrane, the American who invented warp travel, from making his first flight
And Borg technology crashes on Earth somewhere, which is actually referenced in the Enterprise series. And Cochrane, who should have died way before Kirk’s crew existed, shows up in TOS because he decided to die in space and some alien they call the Companion grabs him and reverses his aging and keeps him the same age for 150 years just so it wouldn’t be lonely. So all three Captains of the Enterprise actually end up meeting this guy
B: Well THAT’S interesting! Could almost be the Doctor
SG: all thanks to the Cybermen telling the Borg about time travel
B: *head explodes* So this would be before the events of First Contact
SG: yes
B: Got It….Oh right, because LaForge didn’t have his visor in First Contact
SG: First Contact is star date 50893.5 and this was 45635.2
And the Locutus storyline with the Battle of Wolf 359 (which the Doctor pulls a Bad Wolf reference) was Star Date 43989.1-44001.4, So this is between those two
B: Yeah I caught the Bad Wolf reference
SG: Wolf 359 is where Captain Sisko’s wife dies
B: I did enjoy that bit of continuity to The Doctor tells Amy & Rory to stay behind and they say “no” and he’s like “great!”
SG:Haha, I actually laughed when they said they’d be ensuring the safety of the Enterprise away team Riker is like “I can’t promise you protection” and Amy is all “it’s cool, I’ll keep you safe”
B: haha. I liked that Picard seemed to get attached to Amy right away
SG: Who doesn’t?  She’s pretty great
B: A lot of people don’t like Amy. I always did. It’s Rose that gets stuck in my teeth.
SG: Fun fact: The Deltans of Delta IV, the first planet that’s attacked by the Borg in the comic, appear in Star Trek movies 1, 3 and 4. They’re always depicted as being bald, and they’re so highly sexual (to the point that they make everyone around them get hot and bothered just by walking into the room), that they have to take an oath of celibacy to enter Starfeelt.
B: Oh I remember them
SG: They don’t really show up after that though, so now we can blame the Cybermen for that too
B: Had you seen the guys on the Mineral planet before?
SG: I feel like I have, but I forgot to look them up. I think it was the Animated Series
B: Did you get the “Art Gallery” at the end of Volume 2? It was delightful
SG: They’re not showing up on the Star Trek wikia, and I’m pretty certain they would if they were in something else
B: There is something so viscerally appealing about seeing Picard stepping out of the Tardis
SG: I did! I had an art gallery at the end of both volumes
B: Several of those I would frame
SG: The one with Kirk and the Cyberman is pretty great
B: YES! Oh…did you giggle when you saw the picture of Riker playing Jazz Trombone?
SG: Always
B: Because I know did. Hee…I love him, such a cheeseball
SG: I don’t think I’ve ever not laughed when he does that in an episode. Which just reminded me, did you ever see the Twitter account for the 8th season of TNG?
B: I don’t believe I have
SG: @TNG_S8  Feb 14 – A nymphomaniac worm controls Riker’s mind and body to seduce the Enterprise’s female crew. Nobody notices, it eventually dies of old age.
B:  Did you see the comic about why O’Brien has the worst job on the Enterprise?
SG: I did!  I posted it to Facebook and then put it in my RSS feed.  @TNG_S8  21 Jan 2013 – Worf unwillingly participates in his niece’s coming-of-age human hunt. Riker has misplaced his chest comb and it’s getting bad.
B: HA!
SG: @TNG_S8  8 Nov 2012 – An alien boy pretends Data is his science fair project to hide him from military forces. Riker’s sonic shower is set to “silky jazz.”
B:  I recommend listening to Will Wheaton’s episode of the Nerdist podcast, he’s got some funny Frakes/Stewart anecdotes. SILKY JAZZ LOL
SG: @TNG_S8  28 Aug 2012 – A company needs help when their knockoff Datas start exploding. The warp core dries up because someone (Barclay) left the cap off overnight.
B:  haha Barclay!
SG: Sidenote: Barclay and Moseley BFF
B: LOL I never would have put that together had you not said
SG: I only just realized when I read that tweet, now I can’t stop laughing
B: I loved this one: Wes gets his amber collecting club trapped in amber. Picard’s end-of-episode speech segues into a meandering rant on turbolift etiquette. That’s so Wes!